Tracking Nutrition

As I've mentioned, I recently joined SparkPeople.com again. I know that tracking calories is an important part of weight loss and SparkPeople makes it simple for me. I am unable/unwilling to listen to my body when I'm eating. I eat until my stomach catches up to my tastebuds and usually by then I've eaten a full day's worth of calories in one sitting. So I believe that tracking my foods is helpful to me by showing me what exactly I am taking in and when is a good time to stop.

Yesterday I didn't keep a watchful eye as I was eating, I just entered the food in and was so disappointed by last night. I knew I would be, but there was a part of me that hoped my calorie intake wasn't as bad as I thought. Not only were my calories near to being out of control, I was also able to see that I was eating "too much" fat and "not enough" protein. I'm sure my protein intake is low because I'm just getting used to being a vegetarian and trying new and different types of protein.

This morning I skipped breakfast. For lunch I made myself a sauerkraut sandwich--2 slices of bread, 1/4 cup of sauerkraut and a slice of swiss cheese, fried up in a skillet. As I was going I looked at the calories I was about to consume, but didn't add them all up in my head. When I finished my sandwich I thought I was still hungry and justified a second sandwich because I hadn't eaten breakfast. I added my two sandwiches to my SparkPeople Nutrition tracker and they were way more than I had anticipated! I do have enough left over for pizza tonight, but it would have been nice to have a little more leeway. Not to mention that I now feel like my stomach is going to explode!

I guess the important lesson I want to take from this is that I'm not failing...I'm learning. I know that the longer I keep track, the more I will be capable/willing to listen to my body.

Another New Start

I finally decided that I really am going to start working out. Right now I'm waiting for Jamie to go to sleep so I can go for a walk. I re-joined sparkpeople.com and I am all set to get my life back together.

This afternoon I had a minor breakdown after weighing myself. I am heavier than I ever got during both pregnancies. What a wake up! I really feel like I have the motivation to get started again, but I know I've felt this way before.

So here's to new beginnings, again. *clinks water bottle*

*Insert Corny "New Beginnings" Title Here*

It's not like I woke up this morning and realized I was fat. It was a long process getting here and I watched it the whole way. If you know me, you have seen it happen, too. The past 2 years I have started and stopped working out and eating healthier so many times I can't even count. I have gained and lost 50 lbs. several times in my adulthood. Two of those times I was pregnant and allowed that as my excuse for pigging out.

I was weighed at the doctor's office in December and was shocked. I shouldn't have been. The jeans I was wearing were bought in September and were so uncomfortable that I only wore them in public and switched to sweat pants once I got home. I also began wearing my husband's t-shirts at home because mine were so uncomfortable.

I realized this week that I am eating myself to death. It doesn't help that I don't get any exercise. One thing I always judged myself on was, "At least I'm not big enough to be on The Biggest Loser." Well, now I am.

It's sad and pathetic, I know. But I'm not going to sit here and cry about it. I'm going to get up and do something about it. Again.

What are my goals?

1. I want to fit into the full wardrobe of "skinny" clothes that I've been saving for the past couple of years.

2. I want to take my kids to the pool this summer without being embarrassed or self-conscious.

How am I going to get there?

1. I'm going to work out at least 5 days a week to start out.

2. I'm going to cut my portion sizes in half.

3. I'm going to blog my progress to keep myself motivated.

Thanks for reading my blog and thanks for giving me the courage to do this--especially to my Twitter friends! You guys are here for me every day and I don't know what I would do without you!